Monday, December 14, 2009

2 finals tomorrow..

the law stands, but people move

...that's what I said in response to the legal discourse we were having regarding Title VII of the Equal Rights Protection Clause. Its tenets revolve around the realm of sexual harassment, integration, employment discrimination, and all things notwithstanding.

Think about it...only until a decade later did the effects of Brown v. Board of Education actually visibly permeate into the lives of those who never saw nor felt its proceedings come into effect.

Thurgood Marshall-the NAACP's chief counsel, argued the case before the Supreme Court, and in a landmark decision which overturned earlier rulings in Plessy v. Ferguson (1896), de jure racial segregation was ruled a violation of the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment of the United States Constitution. And yet, trends of racial segregation were continually upheld throughout the nation, for over ten years...

Because the law stands, but people move.

The law forbade segregation, Brown v. Board deemed disintegration illegal- those who practiced it were tried. The law stood in its place. But it wasn't until activists, community members, and those who sought to mobilize people of color, minorities and the economically and socially disenfranchised and disadvantaged, did change finally occur. The law stood, but people moved it, by reacting and activating IT.

And that is why, my friends, many present-day lawyers become present-day union activists.

But I digress, both in this entry, and in my studies. -_-


Sunday, December 13, 2009

the monotony of life in current standing must now mean :)

...that Monday is the day of all days.

Monday, October 12, 2009

good riddance

It is so interesting how humans seek satisfaction and pleasure in the ejection of all bodily entities.

A friend and I were conversing the other day about Freud's sexual psyche- and about how humans go through several sexual stages to seek pleasure.

The first is our oral fixation- which begins at the start of childhood where we depend on the mother's suckle to provide food, nourishment, love and pleasure.

We then evolve as human beings and depend on taste, touch, oral and visual penetration and stimulation. We begin to take pleasure in excreting bodily functions- be that in the "pejorative" (sexual climax) or meliorative sense (fecal climax).

The point in all this is that as human beings- the only way we can experience pleasure- ultimate pleasure, in all senses-- be that emotionally or physically- is if we expel whatever it is that we need to.

Whether it is to speak our minds and thoughts relentlessly to promote open communiction- which creates emotional pleasure....
Whether it is to free ourselves of bodily pleasure by engaging in sensual acts- which creates physical pleasure....

it seems like the best remedy in life is to be open in all avenues. Like Leo's "Vetruvian man"...
That's what this blog reminds me of- this idea that we are held taut up against the universe, our bodies and minds open, legs wide, arms stretching, free flying forms; perhaps that is Leo's intention in portraying this man...

Our tears shed away our sorrow and relieve our distraught bodies. Our orgasms release our tensions and our suppressed pleasures. Our words leave us full, our fecal matter leaves us free. Everything escapes us, and that's the only way we'll be happy.

But that's not how life always works. Does it still make me a hypocrit to promote openness when I myself acknowledge that I have non-confrontational tendencies? Does my choosing to remain free from certain acts bind me from being happy in every aspect of the word?

I guess I'll have the rest of my life to figure this out. :)

Friday, October 9, 2009


profanity weakens the mind and cheapens the soul

Saturday, September 26, 2009

in time,

everything will be revealed to you.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

They asked me, what injustices I have seen- if any. I laughed.
I have seen many injustices in and outside of the UCB community. Nowadays, 
the injustices UC Berkeley staff, students, and workers face have become so 
immense that it is important that we draw it to our attention: maybe the system 
wide UC student and faculty walkout on September 24 will do the trick. 
From the ever-growing dramatic increase in student fees- to the discontinuation 
of cal grants, to furloughs and layoffs, to the fewer resources provided for 
students and the even fewer opportunities provided for UC staff members, to the 
ever-strained UC workers that must tackle more tasks outside of their respective 
job descriptions, to the ICE (Immigrations Customs Enforcement) raids pulled out 
against our UC workers- it seems as though all we see and experience is bureaucratic
 encroachment. All we are experiencing is the privatization and hypocrisy of the 
institution. We are becoming subject to the neglect, the abuse, and the injustice
 of all things Regent, President, and Chancellor-related. We are becoming minions
 in this "divide-and-conquer" plan laid out by those stringing us by a thread from
 above. Top-down, self-interested economic trends have strained our pockets and our
 civil liberties. I have seen injustice in the educational and labor sector.  I 
have seen injustice and dogmatism in the very academic institution that ironically
 seeks to diversify and liberate our minds, so that we are ready and prepared to
 fight the very battles we are facing against the very hand that does not seek to
 feed, but rather poison us.  I have seen many injustices in and outside of the
 UCB community. Some, much less anticipated than others.  ~Romina K. 

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

life in my little kiosk

There's nothing profound about this post. I think I have mono or the swine flu or some type of dramatic illness. I'm delusional. I'm at work. And I'm in my little kiosk. You're probably reading this because you want to kill time -or me, for that matter.

I'm at West Gate, sitting inside a cozy, heated office-like structure in the middle of a cold, vibrant campus with bicyclists, walkers, scooter-ers, professors, visitors, EVERYBODY passing by.

While the Edward Scissorhands soundtrack was in my background, I realized that life in my little kiosk is blissful. I see everyday human interaction from a booth that allows me to look out into the world without being looked into. It's an efficient stalking mechanism: I get to sit inside, rain or shine, and observe everybody and everything.

And I really do see and hear it all.

I see a campus visitor meet up with her blind date (awkward embrace).

I see the poor, kissass student trying to boost his professor's ego to negotiate a later deadline for an assignment (failed).

I watch a very bad skateboarder, who hasn't been told he's not very good, attempt and re-attempt complicated (but for him, impossible) tricks that aren't simply suited for his novice skills.

And then it gets darker.

I see a student wearing black clothing, sulking and desensitized, mourning the loss of her loved one.

I hear a conversation from a student who has been feeling sickly and suicidal.

But then there are those comedic moments that alleviate the darkness. Moments much like when tourists from Japan pan over their video camera while I give them directions, who ever-so-enthusiastically wave at me from behind so I can say 'hi' to the camera -_-

Most of the time though, I sit and observe. I observe human beings. Their (awkward) interactions. Their conversations. Their eyes. The umbrella they forgot to bring. The torn boot. The short shorts. The crazy haircut. The crazy.

With no insult intended, I feel like G/god. I feel like I'm in the minds and hearts of every human being that passes by. And the observation is but 5 seconds long. Then every story, every conversation, every meeting culminates into a multitude of emotions and events that occur in my life in that 3-5 hour shift. I take it with me, intangibly lock it up into their respective East/West gate kiosk mafia-looking suitcases, and go home.

What's mind-boggling is the fact that I only see and hear half of it, and maybe not even.

Every private story is then unsaid- unheard from my ears and unseen through my eyes. Left as mere speculations from the observations I make from my little kiosk.

So I suppose, life in my little kiosk is life.
That's all.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

Home? where the heart is

It's bittersweet.

Berkeley is beautiful. But, 3 months?? It's been a 3 month summer break, though it feels like it's been only 3 weeks. How the hell did that happen?

"They" say you should never look forward to an event, not only because the anticipation turns out to be greater than the actual event itself, but also because you're wishing away your days and not realizing and seizing the 'now' that you're living in.

We spend a part of our time in Berkeley dreading midterms and finals and wishing we're on break so we can frolic, play, and embark on crazy adventures, yet we don't even realize that the adventures, that LIFE, that almost 9 out of the 12 months of our charming youth is spent living, breathing, and experiencing Berkeley.

I miss my other home. The rainy nights in a magical place with San Franciscan and Btown adventures involving midnight karate kids, capes, imaginary AK-47 marina videos, lanterns, protests, pickets, lovers, crazies, the works. Life there is bomb. But so is life back home.

What to choose, where to live, what to do, who to be?


Sunday, July 26, 2009

Precious5643: porn name or screen name?


that's for all of you aim/meebo/yahoo messenger/ichat/skype/facebook chat/blah blah social networking website users out there...

online dating... Is it legitimate or merely a w.o.t. ("waste of time" for all you pseudo-internet savvy users)?

Who's to say that the picture-perfect alias you're typing to isn't some random, horny creeper that has nothing better to do but flirt, lie, and manipulate you into thinking they're mister or misses perfect?

Is online dating passive? Is it desperate? Is it putting cupid out of his job? Or is it a legitimate medium through which we can sift through a list of potential virtual soulmates till we (ctrl) find
that special somebody who meets every criteria on our highly inflated technological checklist?

I've never tried online dating myself, but I am guilty for ever-so-innocently entering unique chatrooms way back in the day, where I found potential suitors asking everybody their a/s/l.

Of course, the romance only lasted less than ten minutes. It didn't take long till I realized that the people I chatted with were likely to be lowlives: the rejects of society, the anti-social outkasts who lacked interpersonal skills and thus lived vicariously through the shielded society of the much fantasized and romanticized internet dating world.

Granted, this skewed mentality was coming from a pseudo-pornlike screename user: Precious5643 (don't judge -_-).

Years and years later, I have given up my wildly brief internet rendezvous, and have steered clear from lame chatrooms that provoke nothing but disaster. I hardly think I will depend on a virtual forum to find Mister Right but I guess I should never say never. It seems like it would be easier though, don't you think? You list off your existence on a website, and find a most excellent picture to depict your essence; then you hope that by some random twist of fate you will virtually befriend your soulmate, then! bada bing, bada boom. Capiche?

Lol to that.

After using social networking sites for over a decade, I can honestly say that I have attained one great friendship out of random virtual chatting. One day in sunny Lakewood, Colorado, I was mischievously carousing through an interesting chatroom, till I began engaging in a titillating conversation with another fellow.

7 years later, we are now best of friends. He is Mister Perfect. We grew up together during those years, sharing our deepest, most intimate thoughts about life, love, death, and any other topic two wandering souls can foolishly and unceasingly philosophize about. I talked to him during my time in Colorado, when I uprooted back to Glendale, about all the magical people in-n-out of my life, when I moved to Berkeley, when I joined the mafia... etc.

..7 years later, he is but a phantom (not of the opera). It has been perfect though. We "listen" to eachother, he gives his 2-cents, and I give my 23434 cents...reciprocal, insightful, heartfelt, perfect.

Though, is it even real?

Well, virtually speaking, it is. All the conversations, memories we shared, virtual "laughs" and moments of sorrow we experienced were very much raw and in real-time. So I suppose I cannot say that utilizing the internet to meet new people is a waste of time. I got to "meet" a wonderful person and I have learned much about life through his experiences as did he through mine (cliche, but true).

However, I just think it may be a bit standoffish to meet a potential lover through the virtual medium. Human beings are so intricate and simplistically complicated. If I meet this 7-year best friend of mine, I am completely confident that this "perfect" bubble of mine will pop. Not that he won't be perfect, but this image I created of our glorious, conversational friendship will no longer exist, and that's only because perfection doesn't exist....And that's an entirely different story.

But let's imagine we do engage in internet dating for a second.

If we utilize the formal forum, i.e. eHarmony, I would probably have to type my interests and hobbies in some conventional dropdown box and hope that my match takes interest to my silly existence. But how the hell can other viewers truly KNOW who I am? I can list things like "poker" and a list of mafia movies as my interests, and the other fellow on the other side of his computer wouldn't know that I value poetry, sing opera, and go crazy for a living.

If we utilize the informal forum, i.e. random chatting, I would probably first be taken as a porn star (with my age-old screen name Precious5643). Users would conclude that the numbers are indicative of a uniquely numerical sexual position I made up that outperforms the infamous '69'. Or, the famous "what's so precious about you my precious" conversation spurs -_-. Then, after we engage in a wildly poetic conversation about anything and everything, one of us would eventually leave this nonsensical chat and realize that tangible human beings are much highly preferred than ones that can pin themselves up to be anything you want, baby ;).

So, let me be the hypocrit when I say go on with your bad selves by aim-ing or facebooking comrades. Maybe you'll get lucky and fall madly in love. Maybe you'll gain a magical friend who will get the inner intricacies that define your poker-playing, mafia movie-watching YOU. But fair warning to you my friends. Online dating or chatting is much like purchasing an item via ebay or amazon. The picture looks wondrous, the description is fabulous, everything seems too good to be true, until the UPS guy delivers the complete antithesis of what you anticipated. fail.

But please, let me not discourage anybody from testing out the virtual waters. And if you have met your significant other via the virtual net, tell us about it, share your stories...

Or, better yet, if you're interested...



Sunday, June 28, 2009

a woman without her man is nothing?

An English professor wrote the words:

"A woman without her man is nothing"

on the chalkboard and asked his students to punctuate it correctly.

All of the males in the class wrote:
"A woman, without her man, is nothing."

All of the females in the class wrote:
"A woman: without her, man is nothing."


Thursday, June 18, 2009

Would titling this "orgasm" make you want to read it?

disclosure: this is a schizophrenic blog ...

In the midst of

a President Obama "executing" a fly during an interview and getting grilled by PETA for his insensitive behavior (surprise, surprise),

a LA Lakers City Celebration costing millions, in which Mayor Villaraigosa, who couldn't seem to accumulate donations for recent remedial programs for the city's current $529 million budget deficit, somehow managed to get his 'friends' to cover the rest of the tab,

an Iranian presidential election result causing civil unrest by the hands of the angered and revolutionary youth,

is it safe to say that the BEST explanation for why we all go through such unnecessary hardships, criticisms, experiences...etc... is because, well, "shit" happens?

I'm referring to the infamous "shit happens" phrase- that existential life observation most probably coined by the characters of Forrest Gump and experienced by all peoples and creatures of this world.

....that no matter what, maybe even when good things are happening, something or someone will happen that will essentially KILL it, for lack of a better phrase.

It's quite inexplicable though. But it seems like "IT" is a tenet to life:

- we are born
- we live life
- (we shimmy)
- shit happens
- we die

sad trip.

Nothing remains dandy and happy all the time. Everything and everyone is questioned, ridiculed, hated. Nothing is harmonious. Live in moderation? Too much of one thing is never good. No existence is perfect. >insert every generic and cliche phrase that essentially depicts the stories of our lives here<

Perfection reminds me of Edward Scissorhands or the theme song to Walgreens. It's that unattainable utopia that seems to be so ideally crafted in our imagination yet we cannot even begin to achieve it in reality.

Obama can't swat a fly during an interview without having PETA on the other line calling him out on his insensitivity.

The Lakers' celebration is called into question because while they're banking on their championship, the fans are losing jobs day-by-day- so why utilize city funds to make the rich richer?

And the present-day Iranian president-elect Ahmadinejad, despite his past and present efforts to liberalize society, has managed to open up a can of worms.

Yes, shit happens to us all....except maybe to the Mayans.

'They' say that that Mayan civilization is untraceable because the Mayans 'disappeared' into oblivion by reaching all-around human perfection:

Physical, emotional, mental perfection.

They perfected the art of human physicality, of reaching that plateau-I'll say it: the orgasm (don't act like you didn't finally click on that link). By taking the time to discover and hone in on their touch-sensitive skills and body-conscious preferences, the Mayans were able to pleasure themselves and others and fully understand and appreciate all magical things big-O related.

The mental orgasm would be enlightenment; what few geniuses of this world have attained-one's own gifted ability to calculate, conclude, deduct, induct, create, demolish, enhance, and question more or differently compared to the average human population.....

Emotional and psychological perfection is one in the same I suppose, and that's perfecting the art of interaction, perfecting one's own capabilities as a human being.
If a person, for instance, was crying at a gas station (let's choose Mobil), seldom, if ever, would we take the time to approach him or her. We lose sight of the importance of human interaction and treating each other as familial beings; and instead we just pass along with our own busy, technological lives because shit happens and we figure that, in this case, the grieving Mobil gas station person doesn't need our random act of kindness. Or we don't do anything maybe because we're running late, don't really care, or maybe since 'shit happens', we don't risk helping vulnerable-looking people because we fear they'll turn out to be that slasher/rapist/robber that the movies do so well a job we fill our ever-expensive gas and move about our most-fascinating lives.

The Mayans probably wouldn't have ignored the gas-station victim, but then again, maybe that's why they don't exist.

Technology has made us far too consumed with the temporal things in life; we forget to live life adventurously, cerebrally, sensitively. We communicate dates, meetings, class schedules via the worldwide web. We webcam (some more uncontrollably than others, hi Jak), we fill out our virtual calendars, we order nudesushi and mrs.munchies, and if we're looking, we can even expedite a mail-order bride/groom. We text/email/im/message our lovers, friends, or family when we're upset and we develop our skills at virtually communicating our feelings and virtually laying them all out there, but only through the controlled and lagged process of technology. Because at least we can prepare what we want to say or take the time to respond to something in it's entirety since our fried-brain cells no longer hold the competence of carrying a logical, well-thought out verbal conversation.

We do and express everything technologically...our feelings? We put ALL our emotions/thoughts on an email/im/blah blah and hit the 'send' button only to await another virtual blurb to which we would not only read the reply, but we'd subconsciously analyze:

1. the length of time the sender took to send a reply and of course
2. the way the reply was written-whether it was short and choppy, emitting a character to the message that would allows us to interpret the sender's emotions

Wow, biggest tangent in my life, this blog.

But I guess it all ties back to this universal idea that shit happens? Maybe shit wouldn't happen if we weren't so consumed with technology--- or questioning religion, morality, SEX, drugs...maybe the Mayans didn't have the time to question so much of life because they were only yet beginning to figure it out- and invested all that time exploring their own natural bodies, instead of the unnatural, inorganic processes of what life has become.

Since I've already talked about everything else, I might as well briefly mention Chris- the 'phucking' (pronounced 'fu') Berkeley man, who keeps getting arrested by the police, and is given yearly court orders to stay away from campus, because he does the same thing every day, all day:

-hold signs/posters denouncing technology i.e. 'fuck you for phucking technology'
-screams at people who are using it i.e 'you're phucking your mom on the phone'
-tries to persuade the crowds, who gather around him, to give up their technological ways i.e. 'if you stopped phucking, you'd live a longer life'

He says we're "phucking" technology; he riles up large crowds and tells them that for every time they put on that earphone and listen to a song, they are alienating fellow human peers from interacting with them. He says that we are slowly becoming robotic automatons, no longer interested in human interaction. Instead, we're too busy listening to music fed through earphones shooting high frequency waves into our ever-lessening IQ-filled brains as we walk to class like zombies.

Chris says that technology will be the death of us, because day-by-day we look to make things easier, faster, more efficient. For a man who has been deemed 'crazy' by society, he's completely right. Technology is taking over our existence, affecting our emotions, behavior, way of life...for every lag, pause, freeze, glitch, and failure we feel highly agitated, needy, greedy, annoyed, tempered, flustered, and well, shitty.

I hope Chris' court order is revoked, I miss conversing with him about the complexity of human beings...our bodies, thoughts, minds....We delve in such petty technological matters- giving ourselves and others more shit we can handle. Instead of figuring out more about the mechanism of our being, we strive to discover and master things like unlocking cool programs on that new iPhone of ours..

I mean, don't people find it odd that parts of our feet/body channel other limbs, so you could rid yourself of a headache if you rub a certain part of your foot or shin? Isn't it odd that we have crazy instincts and adrenaline rushes that enable us to act like that one mom that pulled a terminator and lifted a car to get her child out? Imagine finding out how your body triggers certain reactions- and I'm not talking about a pure scientific explanation. I'm referring to those underlying animalistic tendencies that occur during specific stages of our psyche. Imagine controlling your adrenaline, remedying your body by rubbing, poking, pricking yourself without the use of medicinal aid or technology.

But we don't and won't w.o.t. I'll continue writing redundant, tangential, aimless blogs, you'll continue Facebook stalking, your neighbor will continue to criticize that one politician, your friend will mope around aimlessly for a non-existent job opportunity, and life will move on senselessly.

We're never going to sit down and rub our shin and figure out how it makes us feel. We're never going to log every single dream of ours and determine whether our dreams dictate the past, present, or future of our lives or of the lives of others we know. We're never going to truly master the art of orgasms, be it mental, psychological, and physical (though, that could be questionable)..

We phucking don't have time to 'discover' ourselves damnit.

We will continue to criticize and hassle, discriminate and discourage, consume ourselves in technology. We will continue to give shit and go through it- it's quite a harmonious and ironically reciprocal, karmic process.

This is my lengthy stream of consciousness. Way too long of a read...

I blame summer.
I blame all the responsibilities that have been bestowed upon my loquacious existence.
I blame the Mobil gas station.

so what's the conclusion to all this?


did you really phucking expect one? -_-

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

the art of child leashes- nurture or nature?

the other day i was walking back home listening to red hot chili peppers ('i could have lied') on a rather cloudy yet gloriously beautiful afternoon

upon my path i greeted two young twin boys, running around in circles in their matching plush red rain suits, la-di-da-ing around their mother

the sight was eerily reminiscent of elementary school tether-ball-playing days...the mother was the pole as the two children spastically ricocheted like balls about the pole

now, it wasn't because there was some magnetic force that attracted the kids towards their mother's 5'2" existence...nor was it because the children wanted to be within safe and close proximity ....but alas, these two young, vivacious "tether balls" were attached by child safety harnesses, or in my world, what I like to call: child leashes. 

now, throughout my two decades on this planet, I have grown to witness many-a-strange things, child leashes among one of them, but for some reason it finally hit me- not the kids- they only had a 2 foot radius to work with...

but it hit me- how peculiar and downright inhumane it is to attach your child to a leash. What ever happened to our freedom as children, our freedom to live life as individual and carefree souls not yet smothered by the confines of LIFE?Although I do not necessarily agree with animal leashes, child leashes insinuate that the child is out to get society, with its sharp fangs and detrimental nature. But the pure fact of the matter is that child leashes are only indicative of poor parenting skills.

If you cannot tame an animal because it likes to roam about and cause mayhem, you inevitably leash it. This may be because you cannot understand its animalistic nature, so you simply harness it to maintain some level of superiority and control. For a parent to leash their child, well, this could only mean that the parent is trying to maintain some sort of superiority and sanity because he or she simply cannot control the child's nature. But when has maintaining child obedience ever been a drastic issue- so drastic that there is a need to slap a leash and treat it like an untame animal? One could argue that these leashes are for the child's protection. But if that's the case, do we start caging children, do we tie them to a pole outside while we run errands in produce wharehouses... do we start pouring food in a bowl and pet them as we encourage positive behavior? 

Proponents of these harnesses say there's nothing peculiar about the leashes, but if that's the case, why have said leashes strategically been designed over these past 20 years to include characters and figures such as "Dora the Explorer", "Spiderman", etc- perhaps to lessen the absurdity of it all by countering it with something cute, familiar, appealing, and magical?  

The plain fact of the matter is, that as children, we grow up by experiencing and interacting with things, be it by running and jumping around and finally falling down and getting hurt through which we learn to compose ourselves a bit better, or be it by touching, smelling, eating, licking, slapping, experimenting with the objects and people we see, until we (hopefully) develop a sense of what's right or wrong.

Plain and simply, leashing a child takes the child's freedom away. The freedom to explore, to experiment, to live life without being chained. 

Unfortunately, my amateur ramblings cannot stir about any change, maybe a smirk here and there, the occasional rolling of the eyes, etc. So seeing as child leashes won't cease to exist unless we spearhead a revolutionary movement, then at what age does the leashing stop? 

Does this become another case of the British woman breast feeding her 7+ year old where the parent gets to decide when their child is "old enough" to stop breast feeding, or in this less bizarre case when it's okay to kick the leash? Would it be okay if we saw a 9 year old harnessed child la-di-daing in a plush red rainsuit.....

Let's retain some sense of humanity..some sense of freedom for those chained children.

After all, they'll have the rest of their adult lives to bare the weight of the world across their own shoulders...

granted, this chained experience won't be as magical as the one with Dora the Explorer tethered across their chest....

hasta la pasta. aromaLish.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

The malpractice of modern-day American feminism

"Nothing, I believe, has tended more to destroy the true dignity of woman, than the fact that she is approached by man in the character of a female. The idea that she is sought as an intelligent and heaven-born creature, whose society will cheer, refine and elevate her companion, and that she will receive the same blessings she confers, is rarely held up to her view. On the contrary, man almost always addresses himself to the weakness of woman. By flattery, by an appeal to her passions, he seeks access to her heart; and when he has gained her affections, he uses her as the instrument of his pleasure -- the minister of his temporal comforts. he furnishes himself with a housekeeper, whose chief business is in the kitchen, or the nursery. and whilst he goes abroad and enjoys the means of improvement afforded by collision of intellect with cultivated minds, his wife is condemned to draw nearly all her instruction from books, if she has time to peruse them; and if not, from her meditations, whilst engaged in those domestic duties which are necessary for the comfort of her lord and master."

As taken from "Letters on the Equality of Sexes" Sarah Grimke, 1837

Feminism has gone a long way-but it seems present-day modern man is fed-up with the modern-day dominatrix feminist, at least that's the impression I'm under here in Berkeley; he is fed up by her attempts to completely denigrate the male population in her efforts to change every aspect of potential female subservience. We have found present-day man calling her every attempt to free women from the shackles of inequality as overbearing and ridiculous.

With her subtle efforts to honor the female embodiment, feminists, at least here in Berkeley, have changed spelling 'women' to 'womyn', his to herstory, etc...they have changed their everyday habits, use of verbal and written speech, their clothing, sexual and social practices, and everyday {man}nerisms in an attempt to counteract every attempt man has apparently made in subjugating the female race.

But is that going too far? I'm not about to overanalyze or delve into every possible attempt man has ever made to entirely denounce female equality among men. Thanks to feminism way back when, I am endowed with my right to even have a blog to communicate my thoughts. I'm allowed to vote without having my gender stand as an impediment to my political freedom.

But has feminism in America today gone out of hand? Don't get me wrong, I'm not completely downgrading feminism in its entirety, nor am I labeling it to be wrong or outrageous. I will however speculate that the goals of modern-day American feminists may possibly detract from the "big picture".

Feminists from Zimbabwe for instance- specifically the region of Bulawayo, do not delve into the particulars of everyday colloquial speech. They instead fight for an opportunity to increase their literacy by being granted the ability to go to school. They fight domestic subservience by forming writers' and youth groups in order to counteract this inevitable downtrodden persistence of inequality among the 2 genders. Feminism in Armenia concentrates on fighting the double-standard- this standard that Armenian women must remain "pure" virgins till their marriage day, or fighting the government to disallow the act of the marriage dowry which still perpetuates in society to this day. Feminism in China speaks of the long historic efforts in eradicating "foot binding" as a means of female beauty. Feminism in all parts of the world seems to honor just that- the need to create equality among men, women, and gender-neutral bodies.

As aforementioned, feminism in the late 1800s here in America consisted of prominent figures like Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Lucretia Mott who along with many other feminists fought to grant us women the ability to vote, so that we are equally represented. After decades of being imprisoned, killed, sent to insane asylums, ravaged, neglected, and hidden, women finally were able to push through and get us female Americans the right to vote. But even after such efforts, America has only seen a downward spiral among female voter turnout since the presidential elections in the early 1970s.

Is this because women are apathetic? Is this because women today merely concentrate on other aspects of "subservience" that they fail to honor, acknowledge, or even remember what our ancestors of female suffragette movement have literally put their blood, sweat, and tears to fight?

In an attempt to further the existence of "womyn", feminists today have become figures in society that only seek to counter man and his syntactical approach to life. If a man were to lay out my similar sentiments, the female feminist populatioon would ferociously retort by branding him an insenstitive, uneducated, domineering male chauvinistic pig.

I am neither unintelligent nor insensitive. Nor am I uneducated. Domineering may be up for questionining, but last I checked, I am not a man, nor does one have to be to question, or perhaps even 'call out' what the motives of present-day feminists truly are.

Mainly I speak because of the feministic environment, or lack thereof, I am immersed in today here in Berkeley. Perhaps if I trek to Oregon, I would have a different set of convictions for the evangelical feminists; or perhaps if I move to New Jersey, I would be subjected to the eco-feminists of the region.

Regardless, feminism isn't a bad thing. But we must be wary of what our motives are as said "feminists". I will continue to spell women as that, and I will not allow myself to feel compelled to address or behave a way that feminists see fit just because I am a woman. I shouldn't have to feel guilty everytime I say "hey guys" in an environment consisting of a mixed gendered population. That is simply how I was reared: to say history without feeling guilty; to dance to hip-hop/rap songs without analyzing every aspect of a song lyric- now don't get me wrong, I never promote "make it rain on them hoes"-"type" song lyrics; I am wary of social relations between man and woman but I refuse to be dictated on how I should act, or speak, for that matter.

After all, changing the way we speak will never change the ideals we hold. So no matter how many times I spell womyn just as that or acknowledge "herstory", that doesn't make me more or less of a feminist. It doesn't change female subservience in this society of ours any more or any less.

It just makes me go into the particulars of speech without actually actively doing something to promote equality- it merely makes one scold those that don't follow the syntactical political correctness of modern-day speech.

That's not what feminism ever was or should be about.

Friday, April 17, 2009

the muse in music

amidst so much AxF#@$%TRRioafjefds;afeifojxj, for lack of a better expression, i felt the sudden need to just sing my heart out- you know, youtube the bohemian rhapsody and sing along crazily

to my dismay, aside the fact that i am not immersed in a rather garish sushi bar-like environment, or for the fact that i am not currently with loud, obnoxious, slightly intoxicated sake-bombing-dare-i-say 'friends' who are down to sing the night away in inebriated unison,

i'm at work.

..which rules out my dream of intoning away my woes on this very pleasant afternoon


but that won't ever stop me from youtubing :)

...the duduk-

click the link; listen and read- or if this is lame/boring/time consuming then, you, quite honestly, don't know me like that. :}

...the duduk: most probably the only instrument that can simultaneously depict both sorrow and joy; the instrument is remarkable; playing it is most impressive; the sounds that emanate from it are nearly-magestical. the subtleties in the sound- the lilts and underlying dark and mysterious overtones- never cease to captivate me;

Art seems to be the medium we all escape to. it inspires us- to love, hate, live, or maybe even seek death; it offers an avenue of expression, sometimes when we otherwise lack it through words or actions- we all know this, we all find this to be universally true; art is defined in any form with no limitations really~~

...MUSIC. is my muse.

The sounds, the lyrics if there are any- are all a part of this process that entrap me; so often do I find myself enamored by the instrumental itself that I am left shimmying to songs like "Fuck Friends" by Tupac , disregarding the message altogether yet finding the intricacies of sound so fascinating.

*To conclude*

The other evening, I was overjoyed to be with a group of people who genuinely wanted to sing; i think sharing an art is so remarkable- it's like having a good 3 hour conversation with a person you never really connected with before--- you get to be in sync with them on a deeper, more insightful level; that's why singing the other evening was so remarkable. granted, i've been in choir for more than half my life, but there was something about that evening that felt so complete. Perhaps it was because I shared it with a group of people that I otherwise didn't have much in common with other than our ethnicity, our love of playing 'mafia', or our covertness in assassinating eachother with socks.

So yeah, I truly felt endowed by this spirit of happiness and unity which rarely ever falls before my eyes; like we were all coming together (Beatles, where you at), like we all finally had something so beautiful in common with no strings attached; we did not do it to be cool, nor did we do it out of obligation- we did it simply because it was an underlying passion we all wanted to genuinely share.

Anyhow, that's enough music jibber jabber jigga what from me;

music is truly tantalizing-

the lyrics that accompany it are equally as wonderful...

so before I leave, let me grace this page with words so eloquently spoken by Eminem in his "Sing for the Moment", depicting the power of words communicated through the art of song...

"Yet everybody just feels like they can relate {in songs},
I guess words are a
mothafucka they can be great
Or they can degrade, or even worse they can teach hate..
That's why we sing for these kids, who don't have a thing
Except for a dream, and a fuckin' rap magazine
Who post pin-up pictures on their walls all day long
Idolize they favorite rappers and know all they songs
Or for anyone who's ever been through shit in their lives
Till they sit and they cry at night wishin' they'd die
Till they throw on a rap record and they sit, and they vibe
We're nothin' to you but we're the fuckin' shit in they eyes
That's why we seize the moment try to freeze it and own it, squeeze it and
hold it
Cause we consider these minutes golden
And maybe they'll admit it when we're gone
Just let our spirits live on, through our lyrics that you hear in our
songs and we can


Tuesday, April 14, 2009

alas, she is free

I lost myself in Music, yet Music found me so,
I lost myself in verses that I never could let go.

I lost myself in wonder, Of how it died right fast,
How Music and its wonder, would not soon live to last.

I lost myself in freedom, Till I soon let Him go,
When I remembered way back when, I'd let MY rhythm flow.

I lost myself in happiness, No longer music n' me,
Music was entrapment, Alas, Now I am free.

Now I hear a different beat to which notes are not rife,
Now I feel new freedom With new music in my life.


Sunday, April 12, 2009


"The more you look around the more you realize something is fucked up...war, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, torture, crime, corruption, and the ice capades..."

Today is Easter, and along with followers of the religion come those whose cynicism pervades throughout the virtual confines of our earthly world.

So is religion truly "bullshit", is Christianity and every religion out there an opium of the masses- or does religion exist...and if so, which one?

Who is right? Which religion is true? Islam, Buddhism, Judaism, Animism, Christianity, Hinduism, Jainism, the list goes on, the beliefs go on, but which is right or are they all just plain old facades?

Facades that keep us feeling safe when we are disillusioned in this temporal world of ours. Facades that keep us sane when we feel that everything else in this world is filthy, corrupt, and evil.
Facades that promise us a perfect life after death while we fend and thrive in this not-so-perfect scheme of life.

Bullshit? Arguably, there are many things in life that are bullshit: a lack of universal healthcare, a lack of freedom and equality for all, a lack of fiscal opportunities for all....but when we classify a belief as 'bullshit' is that going too far?

It seems that the only thing we got going these days are our lingering thoughts, opinions, ideals, and beliefs. To take THAT away from people seems almost...heartless, for lack of a better word.

So why classify religion as bullshit- why bother even targeting that realm? Is it because those who are not believers are not kept at rest when passing a church construct whose followers try to lure them into their dogmatic absolutism? Is branding religion as "bullshit" an outward act of loathing all things that we cannot follow because we simply do not see it or feel it the way those who are religious do?

I think that religion should be kept to people without their adamant imposition enveloping our everyday lives. That way, we are all entitled to our own ways of thinking all the while we can keep a level of sanity without having to lash out, brand, or be cynical when it comes to religion.

Can't we all just get along? It seems the pit of many civil, regional, and world wars revolves around the imposition of religion, or lack thereof. Greed, lies, destruction- the Crusades, the 30 Years' War, the Armenian Genocide, Roe v. Wade- despite the time setting, place, and circumstance, religion seems to almost be an underlying factor in all things catastrophic.
Is that a safe conjecture? Am I going too far?

Is George Carlin at fault? There are many videos out there promoting religion, urging people to follow- so is Carlin's adamant refusal to commit to religion too rash? Are his opinions too brutal and cynical? Should he utilize his comedic prestige by calling out something that many hold dear to their hearts- that many simply cannot even live life without?

Seriously, let us set aside our differences and come together as one. It's very possible-- we have definitely had moments throughout these past few centuries where we have been just, civil, and where we have lived in amicable coexistence. A world like this is very much possible.